Birdgod1

Prologue

I don’t know whether to walk or just sink down and wait. Either way I don’t think I will survive very long. The sun is coming up now; soon it will beat down on me, drying me out like a fig. And if I walk, where would I walk to? North? West? South? There is sand in every direction. Nothing but sand. There is nowhere to go.

I can’t go East. Not back home. I will never see my home again. They have brought me out here away from everything I know, away from everyone I know. To the Red Land. This will be my last sight – the sun burning down from the sky, the golden sand stretching in every direction as far as you can see.

Part of me feels that this is right. I know I did a very bad thing. And that part just wants to stay here and accept what will happen. But part of me cries out ‘It was not my fault. What choice did I have? What could I have done?’ And that part wants to run and shout and scream that this isn’t fair, that it can’t be the end.

Tucked into the knot of my loincloth is a little feather. I’ve not carried it for long but as I take it now and hold it in my hand I think about that choice; because there was a choice and I made it. And Ma’at’s feather will weigh that choice and make a judgement. When Anubis weighs my heart will my one great crime outweigh all the good things I tried to do? I did try to be good. Surely the gods know that.

And things were not always so hard. Once we were happy.


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Juliet Desailly